The Trivial Pursuit of Happiness

i better go.

working on flan tonight.

later

at school, a ‘work day’ how lame is that?

angie- do what you want dummie. screw the rest of ‘em
* i am your little voice*

feeling much better today. damn right manic. woo. here we go….

i want to take pictures at powells of leaning against bookcases reading- don’t know why, just want to…
directory was up for a min.. 40 some people i ‘know” in that kind of sort of see them every other day kind of way. plus all thjose that say they are from spain.

*remembering the good ol’ days”

tuesday i get paid. i’m thinking a trip into barnes or powells. angie and i are going to kidnap a boy sometime soon, so maybe then. we’ll see.

*trying to think of something beautiful from my day so i feel like this day wasn’t a compleate waste. *

woke up on my sis’s couch this morning to eli saying “dadada dad daddd dadadad. *goo goo* dadadsdadadadadadadada. ” laughed to myself. for a minute he was quiet, and then he laughed loudly. “DADADADADA.”
from the other room i hear a stir, and something along the lines of “your kid’s yelling for you…” ” ya, but he’s saying your name.”

i used to be scared chances children would someday call me aaunt artica. aunt ivory/ antartica. sounded enough alike to a 10 year old that i told her about it, hoping she’d assure me she would teach them the difference. she holds him facing me the other day. “look! It’s aunt artica.”

women have children all the time to feel loved, like they have someone in their lives that they can always count on… maybe not consciencely, but they do.. promise me guys that you wll kick me if i ever get that idea. i already did my filling in the gaps shpeel.. but he does make days seem a little easier to make it through. all the wrong reasons to bring something into the world.

gonna do my character analysis.. i am a doe.

still at my sis’s. have rehersal today, but my script is aat lisas.. and i don’t have my car. soooo i am waiting for her to decide to go home from jays… if anyone else is headed towards skamania from stevensn, let me know. i may bum a ride.

chance made me want some cheese on a stick from seaside. yummmmmmmm

going to see if i can get out of work on the 11th. if not- little friends can keep me awake for work- just have to be back here by 1:30.

pay day tuesday/ owe href="http://www.livejournal.com/users/twilite_ang/">angie 10, kat 5, … anyone else? i HATE owing money….

ooo my sis is using the blender. wonder why…… strawberries!!! mushed strawberries!!! so many uses!!!

drempt last night i saw a plane try to take off from hwy 14 and crash. #1- does that mean i feel like i may never get out of here, and #2. it reminds me of a friend whom i care about but rarely have a chance to talk to. do not ask why. but it makes me sad. both things really.

watched the movie ‘the skulls’ this morning with the baby.went to the theater with glenn. haha. such a bad movie, such a long time ago.

drempt luke came to see us at school,
doit doit

attacked by the extreem need to BE ALONE> or at least in different company. Ah HA! chances house is empty, she has cable, the internet and a bathtub. so my dear, i am sleeping here. what time will you be home ?

on the ID here it says parker called, but i don’t have any messages. hummmmm. makes me wonder.

thinking today- i don’t think anyone knows me. anyone. and that kind of bothers me. i think that is what we all want when we say we want to be in love, we want to be marryied, we want children. we just want someone to fill that hole, someone to know us, and accept all of our flaws. and i don’t know if that is possible. i think you have to fill that gap yourself… and i am yet to do so.

be on later, i’m sure.

gonna go get movies and hang out here tonight- cousins went home. stories there, but not right now.

chance- luke is here.

xoxo

at lisa’s now.. no work tonight…. 8430. someone call me damnit.

went to a hobby shop and talked pokemon with an old guy. it was great.

watched people i love do things i do not like watching them do. kept my mouth shut, other than to cough and walk out. *sigh* (note: do not assume things- i will not let you do it!)

wondering what lukes dreams were.

hanging out here (chances) until 1 of 6 things happens: lisa gets off work (7 or so) chance and brandon come home (??) jay, aaron, & heather come and get me (???) or somehting exciting happens, which can take up all the other possiblitities. if you have an idea (a cheap idea) call me … damn i don’t want to give chances # out- the bakery # is (509) 427 0047. cal there and tell lisa to call me, and give me your #. make sence?
No. oh well. do it anyways.

angie- dragonflies and tantric- may 11- pine st. ?? maybe go? i don’t know. i was talking to the guitarist from DF, and he told me we have to go. parker! yes?

i want to take another bath. i am a bath-a-holic. i want a hot tub so i do not have to run bath water and waste it every time. we had a hot tub for a while at the stevenson house… remember taking luke-warm hot tubs? many strange memories in that little shed. the least of which is meeting brandon , chances husband now. weird.

i want a motorcycle.

gonna go see if my best friend made it to work.. she went camping last night, and isn’t the most on time person anyways- i hope she did get there on time. (note she did! woo) and then? SLEEP. (i say, knowing it probably won’t happen…)

gonna go climb a mountain i hope.