The Trivial Pursuit of Happiness

Tom was complaining the other day that he doesn’t have any new photos for his wallet, and I scoffed. ‘Cause I don’t take pictures very often, right? Log thee onto Wallgreens.com and order thy self some photos, sir. It did give me an excuse to put the girls in matching outfits again and make them play in the yard for a bit this morning, so I guess I can forgive him.

I wish I had the time and energy to edit these nicely, but the truth is I don’t really care. I see their faces, and the shabby background just disappears.

More here.

While Ang was here, I stole her (non-apple, thus ripable) MP3 player and downloaded almost 2 gigs of silly, nostalgic music. Her college PC has been dead since 2003 or so, so every song she recently scavenged from it smacks of that time and place. This playlist is aptly named “Drive to Portland at 11pm on a Wednesday”, and it makes me want to sing at the top of my lungs, going 80 mph down the freeway, towards something big, something bright.

Everyone is sick, so other than visiting with Angie who drove 5 hours to see us, we’ve been sequestered inside this week. When I haven’t been accosting my children with the dreaded nose sucker, I’ve been knitting to keep from losing my mind. I quit knitting there for while when my hands were swelling so badly, but fell in love with this yarn the other day, and decided that Ella needed a winter set.

I managed to get a scarf/cowl thing, mittens and a toddler sized calorimetry (I only cast on 70 vs the adult 120) all from one skein, knit on my trusty pair of size 7 circulars. The neck warmer has a crystal button that holds it on, and can be worn like this or more ruffle-y (to cover the chin on super cold days). It was inspired by this scarf pattern, but I decided I would rather Ella not have a full length scarf, since it would just get lost or drug through the mud. The mittens are just a smattering different patterns online, and I am tempted to add some ruffles to them with the bit of yarn I have left over.

Oh my goodness, both girls are asleep right now, so I am going to go run the shower while I lay on the bathroom floor and try to breathe. Go away snot!

With everything that is going on right now, you wouldn’t think that I would have time to seriously consider which nationally available ice cream brands have the best coffee flavored variety. After months of research, and complete surrender never to fit back into a size 6 jeans, I think I can now say that the top two are: Tillamook’s Espresso Mocha and Breyer’s Plain Coffee.

You’re welcome.

Can I really post pictures from my fancy new phone? Let’s see.

I have an opportunity on the table that I am scared to even talk about for fear of jinxing it, but man. Mannnnn am I excited if it comes through. I would be able to be a professional, who could be with my kids all day, working in a field I am passionate about, and making money doing it. It’s something that will be a lot of work, but work I am itching to start. It’s all so hypothetical right now that I am forcing myself not to get too attached to the idea, but I’ll know more soon. If I decide to follow this path (knowing that it may not come to fruition for quite a while) I will have to let my boss at the University know soon, so that she can find someone for the position that I am still not funded for. We are having a ‘can we do this?’ meeting on Tuesday, but until then I am going to gnaw on my cuticles. Nom nom.

So, in the spirit of things I haven’t written about because I don’t want to jinx them, I think I can finally chance writing that Ella is potty trained. 99.8% of the time she is in big girl panties, and while we do put her in a diaper when she goes to sleep most nights, she wakes up, uses the bathroom, and leaves it off. She hasn’t had as accident in… ages. Long enough that I can’t think of the last time. About 3 months ago Pam (my mother in law) brought Ella some Dora undies, and told her that when she could keep them dry, she could stay the night at grandma’s. That was all the incentive Ella needed, and tonight she is taking her grandma up on the deal. She is a stubborn, willful little mule when she wants to be, and I am glad I trusted her to do it in her own time. And thank God that wasn’t when she was 5.

When I started this this morning, I thought it would be fun to see what we do all day. It turns out that we are boring.

2:45 am – Tom wakes up and takes a shower, I fall back asleep.

4ish – Alice wants to eat, so I fed her without ever opening my eyes

6ish – I roll over and realize Ella crawled into Tom’s spot on the bed at some point. Snuggle with her.

7:30 – Alice wants to get out of bed, but I keep sticking the boob in her mouth to keep her quiet so she doesn’t wake up her sister.

8:15 – The girls are both awake and playing on the bed. Eventually they convince me to play too, so we roll around on the bed for a while.

8:30 – Diapers, coffee, breakfast (yogurt and granola for Ella and I, boob for Alice).

9:00 – Mother in law calls and offers to take Ella for the day (she has another 7 year old cousin this week, and sometimes two little girls are easier than one). I agree, since the last time we were apart for any length of time was right after Alice was born.

9:30 – More coffee, diapers and clothes for all three of us.

(more thrills after the jump)

(more…)

Dear Ella,

There are days that I am so sad that you are growing up. I miss when you would curl up in my arms and fall asleep every night; I miss your little bald head; I miss all the funny words you made up before you spoke English; I miss nursing you. I begrudgingly allow you to grow up, because I know I can’t stop you, but most days I am looking backward.

Ella, 8 months old

But today, at music class*, when you stood up and sang in a loud, clear voice, all the words to “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star”, all by yourself, I couldn’t help but think “We are going to have so much fun together”. You were so proud of yourself when everyone clapped, and oh my girl, I was so so proud of you.

I can’t wait for tomorrow.

Love, Mama.

*If you are in my area (and you probably know if you are) and are looking for an excellent teacher/program, drop me a line. Classes start again in late Sept.

I found Tom a pair of boobs today.

They are the first generation of the Adiri bottles, so while they are not pretty colors, they are the same basic idea. They were new, sealed in their boxes, and .50 cents each at a garage sale. I bought them because I had an extra dollar, not really betting that Alice would take them. Why would she? We’ve bought 6 different kinds of bottles and sippy cups, and she has not been interested in any of them. She knows what she likes, which is something I like in a girl, but the bad news is that I’m taking her best friends to work with me (whenever that happens, still no word on that).

So, when we got home, I washed one out, handed it to her, and expected it to be ignored. Instead, she laid back, smiled, and made her “Nom nom nom” noise.

So yay for knowing she won’t starve while I am gone. Now to find an old bra, and cut out the cups. Manary Gland anyone? *snicker*

If you’ve given birth in the last three years, please consider taking the survey. The survey is exceptionally detailed, so it took me a while, but you can save and return to it as you have time. I am impressed with the level of though that went into many questions, and that soon the information will be available nation wide to mothers and families who are trying to make educated choices about their maternity care. From their website:

“We believe that women of childbearing age must have access to information that will help them choose maternity care providers and institutions that are most compatible with their own philosophies and needs. We hope that the Transparency in Maternity Care Project will provide information that will help women make fully informed maternity care decisions.”

Me too.

Edited to add: This link to an amazing resource from the March of Dimes about the health of infants and mothers across the country. You can choose your state on the top left. So many of these stats are eye opening, and makes it all the more clear that being #29 safest place in the world (behind Cuba!) for mothers and babies is not good enough. Our children deserve better, and if mothers will not stand up for our health and that of our children, who will?